Dostoevsky's Notes from Underground

I've just finished Dostoevsky's cryptic Notes from Underground. I can't say that I fully (or even partially) understand it; but I can say that there are certain sections of the UG Man's ravings which seemed to be frighteningly familiar: the paranoia, the suspicion, the cowardice, the 'game.'

I would probably have gotten a bit more out of it if I understood more about the 'conversation' into which it was interjected, and more about Russian nihilism of the time. And a score of other things.

Nevertheless I, strangely, enjoyed it. Perhaps mostly because I finished it.

Pevear was right, though, it seems that near the end he is talking to me, to "us" in the real world--that I am at the table to which he has come uninvited, and that I am the object of his rant. Nihilism is truly an unwelcome guest. I would love to read his notes or explanations of it--and especially what the censors removed from it.

I finished Bonhoeffer's Cost of Discipleship the other day, also. I will no doubt read it again one day.

some (recordkeeping) thoughts.