Yesterday I had my phone trial to decide whether or not I would lose my right to operate a motor vehicle in the State of Maine for 15 days (due to point accumulation). I think I may have made it appear that giving teens rides was part of my job requirements rather than something subsidiary.

My conscience has convicted me in shading the truth; I have not lost my license, but I have lost my clean conscience. I stand before God tried and convicted--condemned as a Covenant-breaker. It is no wonder that the chapter I came to last night in Bonhoeffer's Cost of Discipleship was "The Truth"--and was all about letting our "Yea be yea and our neigh be neigh," and the sinfulness of swearing by something in heaven or earth or taking any kind of oath. "The oath is the refuge of the lie; the lie takes it captive and puts it to use for its purposes."

I have been living in lawlessness. Lord, forgive me. Give me grace to obey and to love. For You are all.

some (unsettling and repentant) thoughts.